Dear Luke

Dear Luke,photo(7)

In a matter of a few days you will take on a new, challenging role. I know you are only 17 months old, but I’m trusting you with a lifelong responsibility. Your little brother or sister is joining our family very soon, and it is your job to be their big brother.

I wish I could give you some expert advise on how to be a sibling. I wish I could promise you growing up a big brother will be easy. But, I don’t have any brothers or sisters. This may sound strange, and you may never truly understand this….but, I am giving you the greatest gift I never received.

image(1)I look at you now, and you are so small yet so strong. You have such a large personality. You are the happiest child. You are constantly smiling. You love being outside. You are so inquisitive. You love to laugh and to make us laugh. You love to run and scream at the same time. You love the dogs, especially Molly. You have such a huge heart and you are so kind…these are the reasons I
know you will be the best big brother.

I know it may seem unfair at times. I know you will be angry and frustrated at your little brother or sister. I know being the oldest child will bring pressure and expectations, but I believe in you.

Please be patient with me. I have no idea how to be a parent of two children. I have no idea what to say or do when you and your sibling are arguing. I have no insight as to what it will be like growing up in a family larger than 3. What I do know is I will always love YOU. Not you, as in “I love my children and that includes Luke.” I love you, for you. You are my first born, and will always be my heart. Sometimes it may seem as though I love your brother or sister more than you. Sometimes it may feel like I trust them more. Sometimes it may appear I give them more than you…but know that is never my intent. I promise to always make you feel like an individual and make you feel special. I promise to have one on one time with you as much as I possibly can. I promise to support you in your personal interests and dreams. I promise to listen to you, and take into consideration your feelings, hopes and desires. I promise to be the best mom I can and to work everyday toward helping you grow into a gentleman.

The only thing I ask for in return is for your love and patience. Please keep in mind, I’m learning everyday just the same as you are.

You are my soul, for now…and for always.





  1. Shan! WOW!! That brought tears to my eyes. As a baby of 8, it is SO important for ALL of your children to know how you feel about them. Every. Single. Day. And how cool, for him to have something to read and reread for all of his years to come. You are such an amazing mom! And I know you’ll do great with two!! I’m proud of the woman you have become. Congratulations to you and your family!!

  2. Oh Shanisty! The tears are flowing here in Cleveland for you! I’m beyond thrilled you get to experience the sibling relationships even if it is as a Mom. I grew up with three other siblings, and it has taught me so much about life and I just know Luke will experience it too. I have so enjoyed reading the journey you write about; it seems to always fit exactly where I’m at with this crazy journey. It’s amazing what these first borns have done to us, and I couldn’t agree more about what you have said to sweet Luke. I’m looking forward to reading about your new addition (fingers crossed its a girl – not b/c boys arent awesome, cause they are- but more so to give you the best of both worlds:)) Good luck with the inevitable crazy birth part; don’t forget to stock up on pads, and baggy pjs for the next month!!!! You’ll do great, cause you are great!
    Love ya! Kelly ( and Maggie, and Mark!)


Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: